“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.”
- Galatians 5:22-23
We live in a world where instant results are expected. We want fast answers, fast progress, fast resolutions, and even fast spiritual growth. But God often forms His deepest work in us through waiting, through enduring, and through bearing with one another in love. That is why the fourth fruit of the Spirit, forbearance, is so necessary and so challenging.
In many translations, this word is given as “patience.” But the NIV uses forbearance, a term that reminds us that biblical patience is not just about waiting for circumstances to change; it is also about bearing with people, enduring difficult seasons, and continuing in love even when it costs us something.
Patience and forbearance are closely related virtues, but they emphasize different aspects of how we endure difficulty. Patience is the ability to endure delay, difficulty, or suffering without becoming angry, anxious, or frustrated. It focuses on an internal attitude and emotional endurance. Forbearance is defined as self-controlled restraint in the face of provocation; choosing not to react harshly when you could. It focuses on external restraint and relational grace. You show patience when your plans are delayed; you show forbearance when someone offends you, and you respond with grace instead of anger.
The Greek word behind “forbearance” in this passage, makrothumia, has meanings of long-suffering, enduring without giving up, having patience with people who test us, being slow to anger and slow to retaliate, and steadily trusting in God's timing, even under pressure. Forbearance is not passive. It is spiritual strength under control. It does not react quickly in frustration. It does not rush God’s timing. It does not give up on people or walk away at the first sign of inconvenience.
Before we try to create forbearance in our own strength, we must start by remembering that God has shown immeasurable forbearance toward us. Scripture makes this abundantly clear. God is slow to anger and abounding in love, not treating us as our sins deserve (Psalm 103:8-10). He bears with us patiently to lead us to repentance (Romans 2:4). He waits for us to turn to Him (2 Peter 3:9). He forgives again and again (Nehemiah 9:17).
God does not give up on us. He forbears, He endures, He waits, and He loves. When we practice forbearance, we mirror His heart. We do not show forbearance to earn God’s favor, but because we have already received His grace so lavishly. True forbearance is worship – living out a reflection of the patience God has shown us.
Forbearance is not just a nice attitude; it is essential for spiritual maturity. Forbearance builds Christlike character, as God uses waiting, endurance, and difficulties in life to shape us. Romans 5:3-4 shows the progression clearly; we move from suffering to perseverance to character to hope. The Holy Spirit cultivates deep roots in us through seasons that stretch our faith.
Forbearance also sustains relationships, whether marriage, parenting, or friendships and church community. All relationships require patience and forbearance with the other person, continuing to love them even when it’s challenging.
Forbearance is a witness to Jesus in our lives, because the world is watching how Christians respond when tested. It’s easy to be patient when things in life are cooperating and going how we want them to, but when the Spirit produces forbearance in us, that is demonstrated through unexpected inconveniences, dealing with people who irritate us, disappointments, delayed answers, and other trials in life. When we respond to pressure with grace, we testify to the power of Christ within us.
When the Spirit produces forbearance in our lives, we see it in our life circumstances, with other people, and with ourselves. Sometimes, God answers our requests quickly, but other times, His answer is “not yet,” and we need to wait on Him. Our patience with God’s timing will be rewarded when we eventually see why God made us wait for that period of time. Some people test our patience in various ways, and we need to practice forbearance with them. This does not excuse sin or avoid necessary boundaries, but it chooses mercy over irritation and grace over harshness. We also need to practice forbearance with ourselves, since we are often our own worst critics. We want instant spiritual maturity, but God doesn’t work that way. Forbearance with ourselves means trusting the process, surrendering our timeline, and experiencing God’s grace for our imperfections.
We see many examples of forbearance in the Bible. Abraham and Sarah waited decades for the promise of a child. Joseph endured betrayal, injustice, and years in prison. Moses waited and led a difficult people with great restraint. Hannah endured barrenness with humility and prayer. David waited years to become king, refusing to force God’s hand to make it happen sooner. Jesus showed ultimate forbearance, enduring humanity’s brokenness, betrayal, and the cross.
Each story shows the same truth: that God forms greatness in seasons of waiting and enduring. If God is stretching you, He is strengthening you. If He is making you wait, He is preparing you for something big.
The Holy Spirit grows forbearance as we root ourselves in Scripture, pray for the Spirit to help us, practice slowing down, and trust God’s timing. We can try practicing forbearance in small moments, by pausing before responding when irritated, praying instead of complaining, and giving people extra grace.
Forbearance is not weakness; it is Spirit-empowered endurance. We don't develop this fruit by trying harder, but we grow it by staying close to Jesus.
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