Now for the matters you wrote about: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband. The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. I say this as a concession, not as a command. I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.
- 1 Corinthians 7:1-7
The next 7 chapters of 1 Corinthians (through the end of chapter 14) contain Paul’s answers to questions that were raised to him by the first-century Corinthian church. While Paul has been providing teaching and instruction specific to their church in that context, that is made even clearer here by the fact that he is addressing matters that they wrote to him about.
Paul will address two related questions from the Corinthians in this chapter. We see the first question here in verse 1 regarding married life as a Christian, and the second begins in verse 25 where Paul talks about whether certain Christians should get married.
As always with reading Scripture, it is important to keep the context of a passage in mind when jumping right in like this. Paul has spent the two chapters prior to this discussing an issue of sexual immorality in the Corinthian church and how they should handle that, along with other sins. Just prior to this passage, he told the people to honor God with their bodies. So, talking about marriage in a Christian context is a natural step after all that setup.
All the sexual sin that was occurring in Corinth (both inside the church and outside of it) appears to be the basis for the statement, “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman” (verse 1). But, that statement appears to go against the traditional Jewish belief of being married; when married, it would be fully expected for a man to have sexual relations with his wife. This statement by Paul is not to be taken as an absolute. It should be taken either as a repeating of a statement that the people of Corinth made to Paul for him to discuss, or it is due to the nature of the specific issues that the church in Corinth was struggling with. Elsewhere in Paul’s writings, he appears to be in favor of marriage – see Ephesians 5 and 1 Timothy 3 for example.
Paul clears up any misunderstanding with specific instruction in verse 2: “But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband.” It’s not enough to tell people not to do something, but they need instruction on what they should do instead. To counter all of the sexual immorality that was occurring, they should instead only have sexual relations with their spouses. Sex should only be between a husband and wife (verse 3). Paul realizes that both genders will experience temptation in this way, so he makes his instructions very clear. This is the way that the people should honor God with their bodies (1 Corinthians 6:20) – by only having sexual relations with their spouse.
Paul’s instructions in verse 4 are reminiscent of God’s original design for marriage given in Genesis 2:24: “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” When the husband and wife are united as one flesh, they no longer belong only to themselves but to one another. They do not have full authority over their own body, but their spouse has authority over their body as well. This is the implementation of that “one flesh” idea that God instituted.
Paul emphasizes that unity and mutual agreement in verse 5 while also emphasizing the married couple’s relationship to God. Paul’s description of depriving themselves for the purpose of prayer and then coming together again is similar to the idea of fasting, except it is fasting from sexual relations rather than fasting from food. They should be devoted to prayer and building up their relationship with God – focus on Him rather than focus on what they are lacking.
When Paul says, “I say this as a concession, not as a command” in verse 6, scholars debate what “this” is that he is referring to. The general consensus is that it refers to verse 2, meaning that while marriage is a part of God’s plan for His creation, it is not mandatory. This is supported by verse 7, where Paul says how he wishes all men were single like him but he realizes that some do have a strong desire to be married while others have a strong desire to refrain from marriage.
His final point in this section on how everyone has been given a gift seems like a foreshadowing of Paul’s teaching on spiritual gifts that is coming in 1 Corinthians 12. But in the context here, it appears to refer to either embracing the gift of marriage or refraining from it, which can also be a gift.
It is important to remember that this letter of 1 Corinthians was written to specific people in a specific context at a specific point in time, but the concepts still apply to us today. While our culture has adamantly tried to change the definition of marriage, God does not change and God’s definition of marriage has not changed. Marriage is still defined by God as between one man and one woman. God’s design of marriage is still supposed to be reflective of His relationship with His Church. Marriage cannot be redefined because God has not redefined it for us; His definition still applies.
Marriage and proper sexual relations within it are one way that we as believers can honor God with our lives and with our bodies. That was true back in the first century in Corinth, and it is still true for us today.
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