by Eric Hansen
“Then the LORD God formed a man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.” - Genesis 2:7
Ever have shower thought? You’re taking a shower, bath, out in the pool, etc. and some random thought just pops into your head. That happened to me and is part of the inspiration of this blog post (and this series).
I’ve had asthma ever since I was about 12 (as of this writing, I’m 35). I’ve definitely had my fair share of times I literally could not breathe, almost like I was Adam before God gave him life. When you have an asthma attack, the typical process you follow is to try and relax (stressing about the event only causes the breathing to become more shallow) and use an inhaler. If you’re able, a nebulizer is an even better option, and far more portable now than they were back then. But when you feel lifeless, you just look forward to that next breath.
One time when I was in the doctor’s office going through a bit of an asthma attack, the nurse gave me a nebulizer treatment. During that time, she instructed me to make a closed fist with my thumb inside of the fingers (basically resting on the palm and fingers on top of the thumb), and put my arms and hands to my side. This could be done sitting down, standing up, etc. It opens up your airwaves more and helps you breathe better. There was a sense of “I’m going to be okay,” and it reminded me of when God breathed into Adam.
The objective of the above story is to highlight the importance of life and breathing and how they’re interconnected. It’s also become a very helpful mechanism when I have panic attacks due to my hyper-focusing, leading to catastrophic thinking. It’s led to many thoughts of “God doesn’t love me” and, if you can believe it, worse than that. During a therapy session, my therapist instructed me to read John 17. Ultimately, this is a very beautiful passage of Jesus praying for all believers throughout the world and until the end of time. When reading this passage, it grounds me into the present, even if the present is just the fact I’m reading something or if it’s a feeling washing over me of “God really does love me and He’s right here with me.”
The meaning of the chapter is straightforward as I said above, but like the layers of an onion, the layers of this chapter go deep and are thick with flavor, substance, and reality. It deserves a deeper focus on application and thought. I’ve often heard and believed that the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5-7 is the crux of Jesus’s ministry. I also see John 17 being the crux of Jesus’ prayers. Nothing about the chapter is focused on Jesus as a man; it is all God-focused. When you are wanting to reel down the anxiety, it really helps to focus on something other than what you’re stressing about. This is especially a good time to be reading God’s Word.
Hyper-focusing can be a great thing, but it can also be horrible depending on what you end up focusing on. During those times of intense fear and concern, reading this passage has helped bring me to the present and give me that life back spiritually speaking a few times as of late; it is like holding my clenched fists to my sides and God breathing into my nostrils. I want to bring this seed to others and let them enjoy the free gift of God’s Word as well, and I hope you will remember this passage and focus on it during your own times of anxiety.
This forum is meant to foster discussion and allow for differing viewpoints to be explored with equal and respectful consideration. All comments are moderated and any foul language or threatening/abusive comments will not be approved. Users who engage in threatening or abusive comments which are physically harmful in nature will be reported to the authorities.
by Eric Hansen
Anxiety seems to be a topic I either talk or write about frequently. It’s definitely a part of me that evil tries to use against me, and it succeeds so very much. In fact, earlier in the day that I wrote this article, I had some pretty intense panic attacks and didn’t even know why!
At the start of this year, I committed to God that I would treat Him as the ultimate authority above all else. Whether that be decision making, desires, paths to cross, etc., I decided to make a conscious effort to consult and pray with petitions for it all (Philippians 4:6-7). While I have failed at that more often than not, ultimately this is an important piece to recent events that have caused some significant anxiety within me.
With that commitment in mind to God, it had been a drastic whirlwind inside. There were moments where I was as cool as a cucumber, and other moments where I was as frantic as a person drowning and unable to swim (speaking from experience). The balance has definitely been a struggle in being able to keep grounded in faith. The turning point, though, for all of this happened after “suffering” constantly for a few weeks.
I really hadn’t been in God’s Word like I knew I should have. How else am I really going to hear God if I’m not focusing on Him? Even though I had been praying to God all throughout this to either keep the path clear or destroy it as you please if it’s not your will, I needed to be obedient to God. I woke up one morning at 4:30 AM in a panic attack. The first thing I did was dig into my devotional book of Jesus’s parables. I can’t say that the parables helped, but just reading the Scriptures and thinking and meditating on them started to bring me peace. The parable I read was about the persistent widow (Luke 18:1-8). The significance to reading this in my emotional state was realizing I needed to be more persistent in praying to God and what I pray on. If I truly wanted God to be my guiding light through life, then I needed to seek Him more constantly.
I wish at this point I could say that everything was peachy, that the weight of anxiety started lifting. But reality had other plans, slapping me with more anxiety and testing my commitment and reliance on God. There were some periods in that escalation when I felt like giving up on life, asking if things are worth this. Not only did the original matter become a bigger part of the anxiety, but another problem arose as well that made it even worse. These are the times where you often just know evil is trying to create that division.
Ultimately, though, it helped me to remember what sin is. (Check out recent writings by fellow blog writer Charlie Wolcott for more on this.) At its core, sin is any separation between God and man (or me in this case). This means that the increased anxiety trying to consume my thoughts, dreams, and life was trying to separate me from God by directing my very soul to the problems I was dealing with. The sad thing is, I had no control over either problem, so I was having all this anxiety regarding things that I couldn’t do anything about to begin with. So then why was I allowing this division, this sin, to happen to begin with?!
It was at these revelations that I realized I needed to just focus on God. I needed to acknowledge the anxiety, fears, and thoughts but let the Prince of (amazing) Peace come save me. After all, if I'm telling people He’s my Lord and Savior, why am I not depending on Him as such?
I have a Korean-English bilingual bible that has hymns in it. My thought wasn’t to go to them, but I ended up opening the Bible to one of them. In fact, what I opened up to was a hymn called 너 근심 걱정 말아라 (Be Not Dismayed Whatever Betide) that has a repeating phrase of “God will take care of you.” I would say this greatly reminded me, especially as I kept re-reading the hymn, that God will in fact take care of me. This then led me to reading the psalm it is inspired by (Psalm 91), which I read a few times. In fact, I even read it today while having a pretty noticeable panic attack. Through my reading, I have been praying to God, praising and bringing my fears to Him.
Things aren’t perfect by any means, and I’m still fighting anxiety pretty heavily. But reading Psalm 91 brought me to reading through Ephesians (with a heavy heart towards chapter 6). This whole exchange has tested my ability to rely on God, to trust Him with things in my life, and to realize just how wonderful and peaceful He is when I’m in His presence. I don’t regret having had to go through all of this, and the talks I’ve had with people also guide me in it. Right now, my spirit basically demands more Scripture, and I try hard to satisfy that thirst.
Amen.
This forum is meant to foster discussion and allow for differing viewpoints to be explored with equal and respectful consideration. All comments are moderated and any foul language or threatening/abusive comments will not be approved. Users who engage in threatening or abusive comments which are physically harmful in nature will be reported to the authorities.
by Eric Hansen
In my last article, I mentioned some (mostly hidden) struggles that a Christian who has ADHD may run into. Like my theology, I respect the issues but would much rather look to the solution. As a Christian, our solution to all of our problems is Christ, but ADHD can put a damper on believing that. So what about ADHD can be considered a blessing?
Hyperfocus
While it is true that hyperfocusing can be an issue, it can also be a blessing. There have been days I sit and read the Bible, study it, and meditate (read: think) on it. I first realized I could do this back in high school, and thought it was a superpower more than anything.
When we hyperfocus, we can get to a point where everything around us is silenced. We drill into what it is we are doing. I imagine it is close to the times Jesus went alone to pray. He didn’t want any distractions when talking to the Father, and He knew what to do.
Granted, it can be difficult to turn it on or off, but when used with aides to keep aware of what time it is (i.e., so we remember to eat), we can truly give God all of our attention and be attentive to Him.
Emotional Dysregulation (Mood Swings)
How can emotional dysregulation (lets call it EmD for short) be positive? I feel this is definitely one of those elephant-in-the-room elements.
The linked article makes it sound like it’s a horrible thing, and it can be (as with most worldly things). But, once we start putting it into the frame of “God blessed me with this because through Him, He knew great things can happen,” then the world becomes a bit less dark.
One thing that people can often forget is that a Christian is still human. Having EmD exposes us to extreme emotions, but that allows us to experience humanity that much more. If you join a Christ-centered group like Celebrate Recovery, for example, you’ll be exposed to people going through a lot of emotions, too.
Having been through Celebrate Recovery myself for food addiction, I saw people come through with addictions mostly to drugs and alcohol. These emotions would often make them feel alone or in a dark pit. One of the best gifts God can ever bless us with while on Earth is the ability to use ourselves as a vessel to spread His love. By this I mean that a connection can be made based on such raw, vulnerable emotions, which can then let you express how Jesus’s blood brings you rest.
Procrastination
This is definitely one that can be annoying. I can give you a list longer than time it feels like where I’ve procrastinated. But this can be a positive in the Christian world as well. But let's also group running late into this as well, as it’s usually a byproduct.
The end result when I procrastinate is “I wish I didn’t waste my time!” The more I realized just what I was (not) doing, the more I asked myself why:
- Why don’t I just do it?
- Why do I wait so long?
- Why can’t I get that time back?
- Why don’t I make better use of my time?
This brought me to realize that the same applies to my faith. I can’t sit around and wait for the “perfect opportunity” to come along to serve God. I need to be doing what I can now to prepare for what He’s laid on my heart, even if I have to pivot halfway through. It’s helped me realize the value of my time where I spend it.
Imposter Syndrome
It’s common to feel like you don’t deserve something or that you could work harder. This is basically what imposter syndrome is, where you reject praise and accomplishments because you feel undeserving of them.
The greatest part about this feeling is that it’s exactly the story of the Bible. The Old Testament is full of the moral law (working harder for grace) and showing that it’s not work that gets you that grace. We then get to the New Testament, where God’s redemption of His people comes about, and we realize that we don’t deserve that grace to begin with. Yet, even through our faults, He gives it to us anyway.
This not only allows us to express the gospel in a relatable way, but we also gain a much deeper, relational, and personal understanding of God’s love. I feel that those without imposter syndrome can spend years achieving what those with it can discover in a fraction of that time. It’s not a race by any means, but it helps us connect the dots faster, quicker, and easier.
Comparing Yourself
I ended the struggles article with this, and I feel it’s fitting to end the blessings with it as well. At its core, I feel that this is the epitome of an ADHD’s internal struggle and encompasses everything above and more.
On an almost daily basis, it feels like I recall commenting on a post on a Reddit forum on Christianity saying that we should always try to be Christ even though we’ll never achieve it. The person I was responding to gave me a paraphrased response of, “Haha! That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard!”
Given our EmD, perfectionism, procrastination, hyperfocus, and a myriad of other adjectives, we can greatly model Christ’s humanity. We’ll never achieve it fully, but already outlined here are models of who and how Christ is. While He never compared himself to anyone, He did have great empathy, focused solely on God, had bouts of frustration, and felt not just pain but glory.
I’m a fan of Tony Evans. In his book Kingdom Man, he talks about how Christ entered his family. The long story short is that Tony’s dad came to Christ first, and that drove a deep wedge between father and mother. His mother would constantly try to push his dad away, and his dad would not fight but love. One night, his mom came to his dad, crying and asking why he’s not rejecting her while she is him and she wants what he has. At that point, a family came together in Christ out of love and modeling Christ.
I wouldn’t suggest trying to cast out demons, but I would definitely suggest grabbing a friend if you can and go tell someone about Christ. Look at how Christ talked to certain people, and try to model that. He didn’t go to the well and immediately tell the woman she was a sinner; first, He asked her for some water (John 4). He also didn’t go to the Pharisees and immediately tell them they were sinners, but when they spoke, He spoke the truth.
Don’t wait for the perfect opportunity to glorify God. Read the room, but also make the opportunity. If you see someone looking distraught, don’t be afraid to speak with them. If you see someone happy, don’t be afraid to ask them what brings them so much joy.
ADHD is often categorized as a disability, placed under the same umbrella term with things like amputation, bipolar disorder, etc. Realistically, though, something is only a disability if we can’t see the blessings it gives us when it comes to helping our Father. As of this writing, I’m 34 years old, and for 20+ of those years I felt like I was un-human since I struggle to do some things I see others do without thought. That was before I accepted the way I’m designed and truly appreciated that God made me in such a way that He knew that through Him, I can serve Him fully. I hope to continue sharing my experiences of this walk through life with everyone, and so I’m also treating this as a running series where I can share such matters with you.
This forum is meant to foster discussion and allow for differing viewpoints to be explored with equal and respectful consideration. All comments are moderated and any foul language or threatening/abusive comments will not be approved. Users who engage in threatening or abusive comments which are physically harmful in nature will be reported to the authorities.
by Eric Hansen
Some of the hardest things we can write about are criticisms about us. This is no different, especially since I’m just starting to broach this topic on a personal level. But first I think some clarification on ADHD is necessary. The “H” in it stands for hyperactivity, but that doesn’t mean one has to be constantly moving physically. There are actually 3 types of this: inattentive, hyperactive-impulsive, and combined. The hyperactive-impulsive is what we normally call ADHD, but the combined version is most common. While I don’t agree with some of the wording of symptoms (i.e., “careless mistakes”), if you feel you fall into any of these 3 camps, please see your doctor about it. This post or series isn’t meant to give you a diagnosis; only a proper medical professional can do that.
When we start going to church and exploring our faith, we often hear things such as “have quiet time” or “just read the Bible.” For some this may be super easy to do or build a routine for, but for others like myself, this has been extremely daunting to the point of questioning if I’m saved. Even if I remind myself that as long as I believe Christ is my Lord and Savior and died on the cross for my sins, I can still doubt because I can’t just do it. This is made even worse for me because I am an introvert and I internalize all these emotions.
The fact of it all, though, is that we just need to better understand how we function. It’s very probable you cannot sit in quiet space for more than a minute before your brain vrooms right off the Prayer Interstate. ADHD people are better with stimulation, and intrinsic (or internal) motivation often isn’t enough to make us stick to any sort of prayer routine, let alone exercise. That dopamine hit we get when we start doing it can quickly fade away even as soon as the next day, and we’re left wondering why we don’t feel joy anymore from doing it. This can lead to burnout, depression, or a multitude of other emotions. So what can we do about this? It mostly depends on what problem you’re trying to solve, but let's look at a couple.
Prayer Time
It’s no secret we need quiet prayer time with God if we want to build a real relationship with Him. This doesn’t mean do it at night while going to bed (a bad habit of mine), since our minds can quickly start wandering and we need rest.
If you are someone who loves reading, explore the psalms during your free time (first waking up, lunch, etc.). They are God-fearing and God-honoring prayers on different topics. A good concordance in your Bible can help you with a theme as well. I don’t suggest a digital Bible if you can help it, because the more senses you can utilize the less distracted you will likely become. If you use a phone or tablet, you’ll get notifications, texts, etc. that can deter you. Instead, go somewhere with a physical Bible so your hands and eyes are doing something.
Overdoing Bible Time
While there’s no doubt that reading the Bible as much as we can is a good thing for our soul, God also has given us various responsibilities and commitments that we need to honor. If you are a hyper-focused ADHD who can’t get away from something once they start, set a timer. If you have a smart watch or a health tracker like a Fitbit, set a timer to go off. I’ve started doing this even for non-Christian tasks like lunch because I can often get caught up revisiting my work while waiting and forget all about my food.
Just Doing It
While sometimes it’s good to just make yourself do something, it can also hurt your spiritual growth as well. If you struggle with just sitting down and doing something, consider making it something you do earlier in the day. For lack of a better thought, getting the “worst of it out of the way” so, worst case, your hyperactive mind can reflect on it longer throughout the day.
Committing To It
An extremely common trait of one with ADHD is starting but not finishing something. There are about 10 scripts and 5 outlines of content for my ministry and Worldview Warriors sitting in my “inbox” still.
Being a Christian is a 24x7x365 commitment, and one not even the greatest can achieve. This is where having something like a todo list or journal of some sort (I’ve started going back to bullet journaling) can be great for you. Planning is a great thing for us to do, so we know what we’re committing to and what it will take to accomplish that goal. While this topic as a whole can take an article in itself, I’ll provide a good bullet journaling starter guide at the end of this article.
Comparing Yourself
Comparing ourselves to others is another common trait an ADHD person can have. This correlates more to perfectionism, but there’s a strong bisection between the two.
We can look at our pastor, elders, or others in the congregation and see how they may have the “perfect” Christian life. Even if we get to know them and realize they’re far from perfect and still going through sanctification like us, we can get caught in that comparison loop.
This is a very tough element to resolve. It took me a good few years of just asking myself why when I realized I was comparing myself to my best friend. It got even worse when my salvation started coming into the picture.
What has helped me is reflecting back on Jesus’s words, mostly the Sermon on the Mount (starting in Matthew 5). Jesus outlined there perfectly that sinners have a place in Heaven if they surrender to God, and while we will remain sinners on this planet, it’s by our faith that we will be justified. This made me realize that I didn’t need a fancy house or car, and my health may be bad, but God loves me regardless.
I’m doing this as a series since there’s so much to unload about this. There are some resources about ADHD and Christianity, but nothing (or at least fewer) about being an ADHD Christian. There’s scripture to help us remind our overactive minds to stay focused on God, but I want to explore not just what they are but how it can be practical and applied.
Resources:
How to Create a Bullet Journal Plus My Top 10 Tips
A Bible Study on Staying Focused
This forum is meant to foster discussion and allow for differing viewpoints to be explored with equal and respectful consideration. All comments are moderated and any foul language or threatening/abusive comments will not be approved. Users who engage in threatening or abusive comments which are physically harmful in nature will be reported to the authorities.
