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by Jason DeZurik

In 1994, I was living in Seattle, Washington just under the Space Needle, pursuing my career in music and living for myself. I had been chasing after worthless things of this world hoping to become rich or famous and make something of myself. Then this Alice In Chains EP Jar of Flies came out and I really started to question the choices I had made from the very first listen of the very first song of this EP. The song is called Rotten Apple. It was so eerie, and I could feel the pain coming from the musicians from the beginning of this EP. They had previously released one of their most successful albums and it seriously started to make me wonder: if even these guys aren’t happy with their fame and fortune, why might it make me happy?

It got me thinking and I began to realize that I was moving toward the point of no return in my life. As it says in the song, Rotten Apple:
Innocence is over
Ignorance is spoken
Confidence is broken
Sustenance is stolen
Arrogance is potent

I had a decision to make. Was I going to go all out for fame and fortune and the happiness and excitement this world had to offer, or would I return to the faith of my youth? This was the faith my parents had tried their best to teach me as a child through their words and actions. Were they perfect? Well, no, they were not, and even they would admit to this. But they loved me; I knew without a doubt that they loved me. I didn’t really know why they loved me, but I can tell you now that I have six children of my own that I have a much better idea why.

My parents never gave up on me! They loved me with truth and in patience and self-control. They were there when I needed them. They were also willing to trust God and not be there when I selfishly wanted my own way. Sometimes they would just listen to me, and other times they would give me advice that many times I didn’t take into consideration. I mean, in my mind, they were old, what did they know? How arrogant of me!

In 1994, I came to a realization that I was either going to go my way or God’s way. I figured I was much too far down the road of destruction for God to take me as I was and to allow me into His Kingdom. There was no way, in my mind, that He was going to accept me.

I can assure you that He not only accepted me as a person, but I have tried to serve Him every day since an incredible day in January 1995. Later that year, I would meet that wonderful woman I would have 6 amazing children with. My wife Jaya and I got married in 1997, and we have tried serving the Lord together ever since.

Some of you might be thinking, “But Jason, you don’t know what I’ve done, you can’t understand.” Well, you’re right. I cannot understand, but I know the one who can. He loves you. He’s pursuing you even now. Friends, even when Jesus became my Savior, I still struggled with my past actions and sins against God.

In 1996, a band came out with a song that helped me overcome the shame and guilt of my past. Their name was Skillet and the name of the song is I Can. Here are some lyrics from the song to consider:
Do you really love my soul, even after I hated you?
Do you really know my name, can I really come to you?
Are you really more faithful than the changing of the seasons and the morning sun?
Do you really know my name, can I really come to you?
I can, I don't care if the rooster crows
I can

If you have breath in your body, it’s not too late. Hebrews 9:27 says, “It is appointed for men to die once, but after this the judgment.”

If you’d like to learn more about Jason’s story, you can find it in his book, How Being Consistent Changed Everything.

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