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Have you ever disagreed with someone and ended up fighting over your disagreement? I would guess that every single person reading this blog could say yes to that question. It’s our selfish human nature to believe that we are right and to want to get our own way in everything.

A quarrel is a verbal disagreement between people. They may be angry, and the quarrel may cause a temporary or permanent break in their relationship. Quarrels can happen over basically anything, from mundane things like what to eat for dinner to serious things such as issues that break up a marriage.

What does the Bible say about quarreling? Proverbs 20:3 says, “It is to one’s honor to avoid strife, but every fool is quick to quarrel.” Proverbs 17:14 says, “Starting a quarrel is like breaching a dam; so drop the matter before a dispute breaks out.” Those verses remind us that we should not even begin a quarrel or an argument with someone.

But what about if a quarrel is unavoidable? We receive further guidance from Titus 3:9-11: “But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless. Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned.” This passage assures us that we need to stay away from people who are only seeking to argue with us. We don’t need to use a quarrel to condemn them; they will condemn themselves with their selfish motives.

2 Timothy 2:14-16 says, “Keep reminding God’s people of these things. Warn them before God against quarreling about words; it is of no value, and only ruins those who listen. Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth. Avoid godless chatter, because those who indulge in it will become more and more ungodly.”

These are just a few of the passages in the Bible dealing with quarreling, but they all have the same theme - stay away from quarrels! We as God’s people were created to be perfect and always in unity and agreement, but because sin entered the world that is not possible in this present world. We as Christ followers need to try our best to avoid quarrels so that our differing ideas do not lead us to sin. But for those times we do end up quarreling with our friends or loved ones, we can be thankful that God is always quick to forgive us out of His amazing grace.